Tiny Rainbow

How I Found Out I Really Fucking Like Women

Like, really like. Enough to want to kiss them!

Cue scrolling lesbian stamps.

Ok, so, with that out of the way, welcome to my first article, as of June 22nd of 2022! And what better thing to make it about than how I found out I'm a dyke?

"But Lucifer, how can you be a lesbian if you like Saul Goodman?!"

Great question! He's not a man.

That aside, I didn't find out until a couple of months ago, which was when I found out I liked women in the first place. Before that, I thought I was a gay trans man, but there were... so many goddamn signs that I liked women.

First of all: I liked The Scary Jokes. A lot. I related to most of their songs, which off the bat screams "DYYYYYYYYKE!" because a good majority of them are about girls who like girls. Literally one of their albums is a concept album about lesbians! That was... really fucking dykish of me!

Second of all: I felt more connected to WLW love than MLM love despite the fact I identified as a gay man. Whenever I saw a picture of a femme and a butch kissing or two women kissing in general, I felt recognized, in a way. I should also mention that this was when I still actively selfshipped, so I felt more genuine love towards my female f/os than my male ones, despite my main f/o at the time being Bo Sinclair from House Of Wax.

On the topic of fictional crushes, when I was 12-13ish, I watched Bride Of Chucky for the first time and let me tell you I fell head over fuckin' heels over Tiffany Valentine. Like, holy shit! I love women! She's still an absolute hottie, oh my fuckin' god.

During the time when I started doubting I was a gay man and dealing with internalized lesbophobia due to me repressing, I started having dreams where I was a lesbian, and lived out stereotypical white dyke fantasies (blech, blech, blech to all of those "cottage where I bake bread for my conventionally attractive wife" fantasies by the way), and in a lot of them the lesbian flag was there. My dreams are weird, 'kay?

The final nail in the coffin - AKA the thing that made me realize I liked girls in the first place - was when I got a crush on a girl in my ELA class. And everything went dykehill (downhill, but dykish, get it?) from there.

And that's how I found out I'm a lesbian! I'm sorry, women.